Friday

I phoned Fivemum, her youngest has been very ill. Some sort of throwing up thing, but poor lads had it since last week. Probably from her and her partners bizarre hygiene ideas! Anyway i didn't want to rick going there and catching it so we just bitched over the phone. And as things do we came to bitch about Mrs Gardener and Armchair. Its a constant source of irritation to us both that they didn't have kids, even though Mrs often was in tears about it, always an excuse not to, they seem now to have a co-dependant relationship of illness and are visibly ageing fast. We bitched about them going out doing watercolours like old people.

"God yes, they live like my dad, all that Sunday painting, imagining its good..."
"Yes they are getting so old"
"But what happens when they are really OLD.. they will have nowhere to go, if they are already OLD!"
"But, its good, if they go on.... we will know what its like to be dead....."


Which is possibly the funniest thing I've heard for a year at least... I'm still chuckling about it now.