Monday

Dropped our son off at school and wife at work and went on to the crematorium. Bit early i parked away from the main building, glad to see someone i recognised, Ms Fussys far next door neighbour. (hes a funny old git type, once i was delegated to water her garden while they went on holiday, with a hose pipe. But Mr.Fussy turned off the water before leaving, so i got about a bucket of water out of it then it ran dry!. Old git was in his garden making sure i didn't steal anything i think, i told him and he said he had the key but couldn't let anyone in.... ) Anyway, there as usual was no indication of what to do, so i sort of hung round a group of people at an entrance (complicated by there being two chapels) Old git joined us with some other older people, one of which said he hadn't seen me for ages, though i have no idea who he is.

Typically theses things are either muddling through or regimented like a military operation. I spotted Ms Fussy's name on the board, first of the day ten o'clock. Wandering in with a lot of others, all in their funeral suits, me in my black sweat shirt and black hair ribbon (last worn at our friend funeral)...light death music, then "A'int that a kick in the head"! as the coffin came in (looked too short for her, glitzy plastic handles, glued on crooked too) with guy in top hat and Mr Fussy. The local vicar Batman arrived. looking more crow-like than usually, his sash and cassock looking worn and his face even more so...All the usual stuff, odd hymn prayers that made Christianity to be a real "slave religion". then a Hymn "Lord of the dance" (surely the lord of the dance is pan or Satan himself?) some words on her life and her love of dancing. She must have looked lovely "Latin dancing" tall an willowy, elegant and lithe. I drifted off thinking how sexy she must have looked.

Then the coffin dissapering behind some electric curtains. Words about art and artists being a religion as they had hope that life was about more that it appeared (sadly i don't believe that any more, maybe i'm a bad artist... probably i am) i got sad when batman talked of Matisse dance painting, that one lady who's hand don't quite link with the others, forever slightly apart fro them dance.The last music was "I love to Boogie"...File out, shake hands with Mr Fussy, i notice that the hurse driver is the granddad of one of out sons friends, i smile at him. Lots of the ladies are in tears, some laughter, even Mr Fussy smiles. I tell him that if i can help in anyway...etc... slowly i circulate further away, then to the car... i didn't go to the "thing" after.


I remember Mr Fussy taking wife and i to hospital, 2 o'clock in the morning, 25mph all the way, with wife leaking her waters onto a towel and me saying DRIVE FASTER....